Tag: mental illness
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Five True Things
I have left the house twice in the past ten days. The anxiety has become such a beast (and not a “beautiful” one like that stupid ass book says) that I’ve been having to take my Klonopin first thing in the morning with the rest of my morning pills. I used to be able to […]
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It’s Been A While – So Here Are Some Little Updates
The blog post I was talking about in the video can be found here. For the art journal, I am using The Mad Woman’s Underclothes by Germaine Greer because a blank new book felt like it would be too intimidating & I wasn’t (in reality) going to ever actually read that book. As for the […]
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An Artist Kind of Person
Winter is hard on me, sometimes even brutal. It is usually a season of hibernating in depression, wishing I hadn’t taken all of the daylight I had available a few months ago for such granted. But I’ve been feeling a strong desire to create again after Marie-Noelle Wurm shared this video with me a week […]
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The Second Love
I want to be okay, I’m not even asking for good. That was the goal for this next chapter. I wrote it down but being is painful. I know some days it will be, others less. I’ve accepted this much – and yet there are some things I cannot yet accept. I wish for a […]
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SPLITTING
When I was a child, I learned to think of my parents as good or bad. I learned that sometimes they were a source of nurture, comfort & love & other times I needed to separate myself from them for my own safety & well-being. I learned to split people in this way. I developed […]
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Dear H // 10.11.21
(in response to this letter from H) Dear H, I have the spins despite not drinking since last night. Dear H, My temples are throbbing. Dear H, The anxiety has been bad lately. My eyes feel like dried out cheese. My rib cage feels as if there’s a bird inside who’s desperately trying to get […]
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If I Wrote An Honest Resume
If I wrote an honest resume, one where the sections of time without employment were filled in with the truth – no socially acceptable excuses for them – it would read like this:
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The Second Worst Panic Attack Of My Life
The second worst panic attack of my life begins while running errands on a Wednesday afternoon. “I’m Kaitlyn Mauro.I’m 26 years old.I live on Winona Avenue in Montgomery, Alabama.I’m in the car with Edward.He’s my husband.He’s holding my hand.I’m from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.My parents are Sandy and Neil.My grandparents are Marilyn, Guy, Patricia, Ernie and Kathy.My […]
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How Sad, How Beautiful
My world ended when you told me you would come back to Saint Louis then changed your mind. I was already looking at apartments for us — how sad and how beautiful. I trashed my apartment. My world ended when you told me I was too much for you, too much for your family — […]